Finding My Voice

I’m sick of the voices inside of my head. No I’m not a psychopath, let me clarify.

Attention is the most sought after commodity we all have. And more than any other time, demand for that commodity has outpaced supply. The average day of the mid-twenty year old American will consist of a barrage of push notifications, emails, YouTube ads, pop-up ads, phone calls, text messages, snapchats, instagram comments, netflix episodes and facebook friend requests.

The warm glow of the computer, TV or smart phone screen draws our attention like a mosquito trap ready to zap away any original thought we have and fill the void with the latest product to buy or the 10 Reasons You Need to Read This list you absolutely need to click on.

My poison of choice have been books and podcasts. There is a glimmer of being able to identify with an authors point of view and see a new perspective on how we should all be playing this game called life. It’s nice to feel like there are others out there trying to figure it all out too.

However, after consuming my fair share of advice from self-help guru’s, I’ve realized that the same general message has been packaged and repackaged in new book covers for decades all the way back to when Dale Carnegie was telling people how to Win Friends and Influence People.

What I want to hear is my own voice. Not the voice I think sounds ugly in recordings, but the other one. The little one that when I was 6 told me dinosaurs were cool and that becoming a ninja was a realistic career path. It’s the one that said I should draw and build forts out of couch cushions. The voice that said liking something is enough of a reason to do it and not because it leads to a stable job with a retirement plan.

I miss that voice. And so the next time I’m in line for the bathroom, or I step on an elevator, I’ll resist the urge to pull out my phone and instead stand in silence. Because maybe then, as the fear of a missed text or tweet subsides, I’ll be able to look out at the world in front of me and realize something much more terrifying…

That the floor is lava.

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